Dine with God

Actually it should be named "Teatime Invitation of God within a Dream" but the name is too long...

Basically it's a scene from the story "Lonn" I made [link] , where the misfortune and tragic main character jaeru was born with the soul of Shovilro the Shadow God within his body.

In this scene he meets the Shovirlo in his dream...

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[Dine with God - Full text]

I remember when I last closed my eyes, I was under the broken hut in the rain, seeking shelter and hideout in a unnoticed corner of this world , hiding from the people in the world who see me as peril. But as I open my eyes I see misty sky with 3 moons, and surreal sceneries, and within that, not far away, I see IT, standing on the bridge.

I was invited into this dream, by Shovirlo.

It doesn't look particularly evil or strange as I thought, instead rather an emotionless but unnaturally beautiful figure with its face like a perfectly made doll. When it lays sight on me it acknowledge my coming like a host expecting guest...

But why? Why it suddenly turns out like this? Why would the God wants to talk to me?... The same being that I suppose to hate to the soul for causing all the misery for me and my sisters.

IF ONLY IT NEVER EXISTED...

My anger turned dust, strangely, when I tried to gaze upon its face, as if I'm staring into a deep and beautiful pond of water at night. Then it was all the silence, under this misty sky and flowing river, slow and timeless…

“Are you…God?” Eventually I asked, not knowing a better way to open the conversation in this situation.

I can see it smiled for a moment, although not on its face. “Strange you ask that, Jaeru,” its voice is soft but low, with no sense of emotion within, “when it was the human and beings in this world that name me “God”…”

Shocked, I never expected it to say something like that, nor had this thought floating in my mind. However moments later I realized it is nothing but the obvious – it wasn’t God that created and rule the men, but men made and worship God, or something so powerful that is God-like in their perception. From the “God” point of view, this whole thing seems to be nothing but a silly act played and watched by men themselves, perhaps.

Despicable human… to think our suffering is partially because of that… men hide their evil under their skins, then blame their wrongs on someone that’s different or unfortunate, like me and my sisters…


“…Would you like some…?...” it speaks softly, laying sight on the tea and mask shaped sweet cakes on the table, delicate and dream like forms. I stepped in, sat down and have them as my conscious move slowly with this misty atmosphere.

Slowly…

“Fits your taste?…” Its eyes are like blood-red moons, staring into mine. For a moment I’m amazed that “God” speaks ordinary things, and feel it’s actually just a being that I don’t know rather than a deity. Gazing into me, it sees the confusion and questions within, “…Barthodiel is impossible to be communicated by men in any method for its nature (it’s an essence capable only of pure thoughts of blood, gore, pain and violence), while Tmorrtanl deceives too much, of course, part of the reason you’re here is that you are quite unique, from all the human I have seen.”

Mentioning the name Barthodiel irritates my nerve, as I remember Jade, my poor younger sister who had her simple and naïve mind suffered from the hate of God and the world, only because she’s a chosen host by this “God of Blood”, like me and Shovirlo. “Then WHY--!!” it bursts out my mouth naturally without thinking, though I already know that it’s just happened to be the work of fate and sinful nature of human being (God chose them by random and human abused them because of fear, greed and so.), still I want to ask why did all these happen.

Shovirlo stares me with its deep but relaxed eyes, “Gods may die,” totally not the words I expected to say, I was shocked a little, ”as much well as anything else that born, live and perish in this world.” It leans it head and sight aside with the soft breeze, ”even for entities that are called God…” then it speak words that totally shocks and stun my mind:

“…And the key for that could be you, afterall, our fate ties so close together.”

And who knows how fate will play out? Even for God? Shovirlo is inside him, and both their choices will affect each other, changing the way they think and act, and thus the result and future to come…isn’t it?

Man or God, they all stand equally in front of fate, nothing more or less than a part of the great cycle. They each are just playing their own parts with their born natural instinct, doing what they’re born to do.

There is no God in here in the first place, I really realized, just another living being in front of my eyes…I should’ve known that, yet… I just don’t know who or what to blame for all these tragedies, and I wanted to blame on someone, something, the human, the God, the fate, just as the same thing like the human did to me and Shovirlo, Jade and Barthodiel, Londel and Tmorrtanl.

Is it too much to ask for lions and cows to get along happily? Much like a faerie tale picture draw by children, something that is so simple and beautiful but only, and only belong to the places in dream?

Still, there maybe something I can do and change, afterall, like what it said, my tie with its fate is strong, and I maybe the key to change it. It has little to do with difference of power, but how we each view and make decisions within fate itself.

“But… why are you telling me this?” I stand up, asking it before readying myself to leave. It doesn’t answer, but instead looks at the scenery like this has nothing got to do with it, and it knows everything from the start, caring not what will happen. Emitting a slight atmosphere of sadness around itself, Shovilro seems to concern my leave more than that, and this feels like a way for it to say farewell.

I glanced the doll like figure in the mist for a moment, then turn my head and leave quietly.

I have made up my mind, to save Jade from this cursive fate, with everything I have and can.